The Dude and the Zen Master by Jeff Bridges and Bernie Glassman

Okay, I know this title is a little bit of a stretch for Z but it's the closest I could get!  (Plus,  I've written about it before so that proves it's been significant in my life!)

This lovely  book is a collection of transcripts of conversations between Jeff Bridges and his friend/spiritual teacher, Bernie Glassman. I like it so much because the tone is casual. The conversations are full of observations and bits of wisdom that come from living such interesting lives as these men have.

My favorite line in this book has become one of my personal mantras. Jeff says "Everyone you meet is your guru, teaching you something." I'd held that belief prior to reading the book but had never quite put it into words. In the years since I've read this and written about it, this belief has truly become a part of who I am. Every single person I encounter has something to teach me, even if that person in a pain in the butt! (Actually, I've found it is especially true if that person is a pain in the butt!) Likewise, everyone I encounter can learn something from me. Not everyone is open to this sharing of knowledge, but when they are, WOW, amazing connections take place!

Jeff Bridges lives in my community and while I've never met him, I know people who have. Each story I hear reinforces my belief that he's an excellent human being as well as being a fantastic actor! Any time I've seen him interviewed, he exudes coolness, wisdom and gratitude. Maybe our paths will cross some day!

If you're interested in Zen philosophy, and what that looks like in conversation, I highly recommend this book. Even if you aren't particularly interested in Buddhism, I think this book has a lot to offer in the way of inspiring the reader to slow down and truly think about life.

N is for Numbers: The Five Love Languages and The Four Agreements

I couldn't choose between the three books I had listed for F so I figured out a way to use them all!

I'm a list maker. I like outlines and guidelines. These two books appealed to me, and provided me with guidance and support, because they are in a format I enjoy.

The Four Agreements is another of the books I buy when I encounter a used copy, to pass on later to someone in need. This book provides a brief, concise plan for living a true, honest life. These are four complicated concepts summarized in simple language which helps it sink it.

"Don't take anything personally" is one of the greatest pieces of advice I've ever received, from a counselor several years ago.  It took me a while to wrap my brain around the concept, but once I did it blew the doors off my perceptions of the world. Reading The Four Agreements helped drive the idea home. Combined with the other three Agreements: Be Impeccable With Your Word, Don't Make Assumptions, and Always Do Your Best, this little book provides a code of conduct that makes sense and helps you to feel good about the way you're living.

 The 5 Love Languages had been suggested to me several times before I finally got around to buying a copy. I was suspicious of a "secret to love that lasts."

"It's up front with the best sellers," directed the sullen clerk at Barnes & Noble, with a non-verbal Duh. "Everybody has read this book," he added, presumably to make it quite clear to me that I was behind the times.

That clerk was right, I definitely wish I had read this book sooner! It clicked with me immediately and my then boyfriend, now husband read it as well. We both took the quiz in the back and compared our answers. I can't say this automatically solved all over our "issues" and assured us every lasting love. However, I can say without a doubt that this book was an important tool in the process of us
healing from said "issues," understanding each other better, and communicating clearly.

Yes, this book and quiz has helped me better understand my partner, but almost more importantly, I learned my own love languages. This book gave me permission to acknowledge that I am a physical person. It helped me understand it's okay for me to crave physical affection (romantic and non) and that having a sexual nature isn't a negative thing itself, but the ways that I handle it which can be.



Both of these books have played crucial roles in improving my quality of life. They are part of my library which I refer to in times of need.